Now cooler and fitter

Hello all from sunny Italy.

I realise that it's been a while since I last posted something here, so felt that now would be as good a time as any. That said, I can't really think of much just now, so now may not be as good a time as any, and in fact may actually be quite a bad time. Che sara' sara', as they say here, which until recently I had never connected to the song that ends the line with 'whatever will be will be'. I always thought that was a French song. So now Italy can be proud of Joe Dolce's ode to lack of matriarchal respect and whatever this other song is called. But I digest....

Life has continued in much the same vein that it was careering forward in last time I wrote. So, to sum up: work = easy, tempereature = hot, girls = hot. Contrary to the English rule of a double postive = a negative, I can confirm that a double hot = good stuff. Sometimes rules can be good.

Last time I wrote, Samp were playing Lazio, which the fascist Romans won. The game wasn't particularly good, but then that shouldn't be too much of a surprise when it included Genoa's second team. The first team will be beating Lecce on Sunday for the last game of the season, which of course I shall be attending. It should be good, and I'm told that there will be a party afterwards in Piazza della Vittoria, which is an apt name for a place to celebrate victory in. One thing that I found curious last week: Genoa were away in Torino playing, in what was essentially a meaningless game for Genoa, as 5th placed was all but assured, and 4th was unlikely. Torino on the other hand are a bit on the Sampdoria side of the spectrum, and so are likely to get relegated. These two teams have a friendship which doesn't happen in Britain, and so it was widely assumed that Genoa would lose, thus helping their old chums at Torino out. They didn't, and actually won 3-2 (the temerity!) which raised alot of ridiculously maintained eyebrows. With my British head on, I can't get over this, as it would be pretty obvious cheating if Genoa did lose without putting up a fight. Also, given that the players are paid quite a lot, I would be disappointed if my hard earned money was being given to people who didn't do anything to earn it. Much like MP's really. But thankfully, Genoa won, and at the end their was even a brawl on the pitch. Good times.

Last weekend I had a new tattoo, which most of you will probably have already seen on Facebook or in person, so I won't put it up here to save my parents the displeasure of looking at it. It's really rather nice I think, and I am at least 15% cooler than I was. What was particularly satisfying was that the tattooist spoke no English, so I had to talk to him in Italian. This was satisfying, as we had a conversation without my being able to be lazy and revert back to English, which was nice.

In other good news, I haven't smoked for 1.5 days, and have resisted the urge to kill anyone. I don't normally smoke alot anyway, but this will probably be a good thing for me, and although not incredibly easy, isn't all that hard either. In an effort to improve my health, I went out on Wednesday to watch Barcelona beating Man U ( :=) ) and got a bit drunk. Therefore yesterday, many things were unappealing, least of all smoking. Expect my self-help guides in all bad stores by Christmas. As Ice Cube rapped: "Check yo'self before you wreck yo'self", although the next line is totally inappropriate, as I'm sure fellow rap fans would agree.

On that note, I think that's it from me to you, so

Ciao the now

P.S. I believe that Clare's husband Patrick (although he also responds to the shorter version 'Patrick') is now a reader of this. So hello Patrick! Also, if you've made it this far, well done, and hello to you even if your name isn't Patrick! Hello! And Goodbye!

A pickle of a conundrum

Ciao tutti

I write this to you stuck between what could be described as a hard place and a collection of minerals that have been super-heated and then cooled over millenia leaving a rock-like substance. You see, I'm watching the final of the Coppa Italia between Lazio and Sampdoria. In the age old fashion that non football types may struggle to understand, I cannot root for Sampdoria, as they are the enemy. But equally, I can't support Lazio as they're fascist scum. Therefore, you see my quandry. What's the greater evil: the city rivals, or the racist scumbags? I think the answer is easy for right minded people, but I've never claimed to be one of them. Ultimately, I can only hope that football is the winner. It would be quite satisfying if Samp won, as I have some friends that were misled when they were young and class themselves as Sampdoriani. Also, using some skewed thinking, if Samp win, and as Genoa beat Samp (twice) this season, it effectively makes us Coppa Italia winners. Glory, glory, grande Genoa!!!

Something else that I've consistently forgotten to speak about here. Sampdoria have a distinctive strip, and their fans proudly point out that it's the only strip in this style in the world. I haven't had the heart to point out to them that this doesn't necessarily make it a good thing. You didn't hear the first victim of pig flu saying that they were special because they were the first one infected. You didn't hear from them, because they were most likely poor and died, and no one wants to see that when they're tucking into their pork chops. If they had been interviewed, they probably would have said it was pretty crap. Therefore, being unique is not always good, as victims of bullying will maybe attest. For those not in the know, the Samp strip looks like a cycling top.

My life here has generally continued in the sex, drugs and rock and roll style that I've become accustomed. Just the other day, I was thinking how exciting a life this was, and how I couldn't understand the famous people who bleat about the trials that this lifetsyle brings. The fools.

I've been here almost a year, and feel thoroughly at home here. I don't need to be constantly wowed by life anyway, but here it's just a bit more interesting and varied than it was in Scotland. I don't know why this is. It may be to do with the job where the only thing that's a constant is the ease of it. I think waking up to 25 degrees and sun every day helps too. Of course, I miss those of you who read this back in rainy Scotland, needless to say. I booked my flight home t'other day, so I'll be able to see your pale smiling faces as of the 25th June.

Exciting tattoo update. I've booked my appointment, so will be getting it done in a week and a bit. I'm terribly excited about this, as it'll look super cool. There's a Games Workshop here, and my old mucker Dougie suggested that I wanted a griffin as a tribute to the years of my life where I stayed in my room playing with fantasy monsters. I can't say this is true, but I did go into the Games Workshop just to have a look. Unsurprisingly, it was full of grown ups with long hair, Lord of the Rings T-shirts, and presumably intact virginities. The models were still very expensive. But it was quite nice to go in and have a browse. I resisted buying anything, but curiously have had some dreams about the place. Maybe my subconscious is telling me to get back into it? I think I'll try to resist that urge.

Finally for now, you'll be pleased to know, I found myself with spare cash before pay day, so bought some running shoes. This may seem very unlike me, but maintaining my temple of a body does require the occasional offering to the gods of fitness. I've so far been for two runs, and neither of them was to the pub or to catch a bus. The first one was extremely difficult, as it's very hard to drink beer and light a fag while you're running.

That's all for now folks

Ciao

Tonight Matthew, I'm P Castelli

Hello guys 'n' gals,

Last night I was drunk from the sheer euphoria that football can bring. Ya see, if you read my last blog you'd know that I had wanted to go the football to see the derby. Due to the prohibitively exorbitant (or should that be exorbitantly prohibitive? I think probably the latter. Yes, let's go with that.) cost of a ticket I had resigned myself to going to the pub with Katarina to watch it (not that that's necessarily a bad thing, but football always comes before talking to girls). But beforhand, I wanted to go to the pub to meet my football-going-to amigos. So, I went along and had a few beers, and they said they'd try to get me a ticket, or just push me through the turnstiles. I didn't really think it'd happen, so wasn't too fussed by this offer. However, after a couple of beers I was presented with a man-mountain who gave me a ticket. It cost me 20 euros, whereas a normal ticket costs me 25 euros. I love the black market. At least so far - this was my first real brush with it.

But anyway, they called the guy Paoloni, and apparently he's quite the big fish in the pond of hooliganism here. Everyone seemed quite impressed. Before my mum sends me an email warning me of the perils of talking to such sorts, assuming she continued reading (hi mum), I'd like to point out that they have a different kind of idea about what a hooligan is here. I'm not saying that he's the salt of the earth, all round great guy that abhors actual violence like me, but here a hooligan appears to just be someone who has a deep passion for their club. I don't know if this also includes cracking heads: they're kind of scary looking, so I didn't want to probe too deeply. But the man gave me a ticket to see the derby, so he's A-OK in my book.

Tickets have your name printed on them, to avoid undesirables getting into the ground. As I had bought my ticket off a man in the street, my ticket didn't have my name on it, so if questioned I had to use the rather improbable line that my name was P. Castelli, and I didn't speak any Italian and had left my ID at home. I was a bit concerned that the eagle-eyed stewards might see through my ruse, but true to form, they didn't care and only directed me to the stand. I normally buy a ticket for the gabbia (charmingly, 'the cage') but normally ignore this and just go to the Gradinata Nord (north stand). However, last night the goons were at least half on the ball, and so I spent the virtually alone in the stand - no one chooses to go there.

Genoa won 3-1, rather fantastically, and were down to 9 men by the end, rather unfairly I think, but I would need to see the highlights to make a more reasoned decision. But still, 3-1, in your face Sampdoria! The match was no classic, but then again, it doesn't matter. During the game, I had the old familiar sick feeling in my stomach that I had when I watched Hibs invariably struggle against Hearts. Or maybe I just needed a pee. But still, I enjoyed the singing and shouting so much that I may try to minimise talking today, and it took a while for the excitement fuelled adrenaline to leave my system, so sleep was difficult too.

Here's some photos of the stadium.

Enjoy, and cheerio

Hello again

Yes, hello again tutti

Today's will be quite a short post I think, largely because I'm tired and can't think of much worth writing.

Today is a national day of holiday here, I believe to celebrate workers. So, today, almost all Italians can relax and take life easy without caring about work. Oh, wait (you may see where this is going), it's just the same as all other days. No shops appear to be open (or at least the supermarket under my house isn't), so I have a busy day of watching tv on t'internet and reading about chess. My life truly could not be anymore wild and exciting. That said, I was out last night, and am off out tonight too, so at least I'm doing something.

Last weekend I went to a big cemetery here, called Staglieno. It's apparently a bit famous, and was quite impressive. I know, going to cemeteries isn't the coolest thing to do, and as it was a date with a young lady, I may have been skirting dangerously along the cusp of unconventionality. However, it was quite interesting. Dying here seems to be quite a big thing and an opportunity to show all those suckers who are still alive just how much money you have. "Damn fools with their functioning organs, I'm off to St Peter/the ground/reincarnation as a frog! That'll teach them." We quite literally walked through the ages, starting with the very recent, before heading up to the deceased for a considerable amount of time. They really should think of a snazzier name for that plot. But maybe snazzy isn't what you look for in a cemetery? In the DFACAOT plot, there were giant crypts and tombs that pharoahs would have been proud to kill all their servants for. Some of them were pretty impressive, and very old. There were a few that looked like temples, and several that were bigger than the house back in Scotland. It doesn't really seem necessary, as only one man's like Jesus in Italy (Berlusconi), and he's still very much knocking about. All this space being taken up for what appears to be an old-fashioned and therefore obviously more sophisticated peeing contest, and it's not getting used.

I'm not saying that this still of pomp around the remains of your loved ones is a bad thing, but it's just a bit unusual to the sober minded view of rememberance that many Scots/Brits take. Why spend all that money on the tomb when you could get pissed at the wake? It's all a question of priorities.

On Sunday, it's the derby here in Genoa. Last week, Genoa were away in Bologna, and were absolutely terrible, succumbing 2-0. Fiorentina spanked Roma 4-1, and so they're now 4th, no doubt pleasing many Florentines and referees. The derby is obviously a Big Deal, so I was keen to get a ticket. They went on sale on Wednesday morning, so I abandoned my lesson as soon as possible and headed to the shop. I arrived a couple of hours after it had opened, and queued for about 20 minutes. During this time, the security guard came out and said something along the lines of "there are only tickets for the Tribuna stand, about 100 - 150 tickets left". As I only wanted one, and was near the front of the queue, I wasn't too fussed. However, when the let me in the shop, I asked how much the tickets for that stand were, and they told me 100 to 15o euros. I was surprised, as you can imagaine, and left ticketless. Come on, I love football more than anything else, but this would push my dedication too far. So, on Sunday, I'll be watching the game in a pub.

I have for some time wanted a tattoo of something Italian. As you probably know, I like tattoos, and have disfigured my body (mum and dad's words I believe) 3 times. After much constipation and rumination, I've decided on what I'll be getting, which you can see here:

I just have to book the appointment, and I'm pretty excited. I realise that it might be a mistake, etc etc, but if this is the worst mistake I make in my life then I'll be quite happy.

I think that's all for now, I'm going to go and sit outside.

So long

Michael